Amazingly perfect .

If i had a circle of friends ...

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What Are Cliques?

Cliques are groups of friends, but not all groups of friends are cliques. The thing that makes a group a clique is that they leave some kids out on purpose. Usually one or two popular kids control who gets to be in the clique and who gets left out. Kids may act much differently than they did before they were part of the clique.

Everyone feels left out by friends once in a while. Friends are people just like us — they make mistakes and usually we can forgive them .Sometimes friends fight and make up again .

But sometimes kids form groups that they won't let other kids belong to. A clique is a group of kids who hang out together and won't let others join in. Sometimes kids in the clique are mean to kids they think are on the outside.

Kids might form cliques in high school. Sometimes cliques are made of kids who share an interest in something, like fashion or the net or music. Sometimes the kids in them want to be popular or want to belong to somewhere they'll get known easier by the ' upper ' crowd .

Both boys and girls have cliques, though people who study these groups say girl cliques may be worse. Girl cliques are often meaner and more hurtful in the way they treat girls who aren't in the group.

If you are on the outside of a clique, it can hurt your feelings. You might feel very frustrated, angry, or sad and want to cry or say mean things about the people in the clique. You might feel lonely if you're alone at lunch or after school, or even afraid if you feel that someone might pick on you or fight with you. You might be frustrated or upset because you don't know what to do. You might feel down on yourself because the group doesn't want you as a member. You might feel hurt because of the ways other kids keep you out.

So Why Do Other Kids Join Cliques?

One of the hard things about cliques is if a person who was your friend joins one and starts treating you differently. Sometimes, the problem starts with an argument between the two of you. But other times you can find yourself on the outside of a clique even if nothing happened.
Sometimes you get left out because you look, act, or dress differently from the other kids. Or just because you're the "new kid" in class. Kids who get into cliques usually want to be popular and feel cool. Sometimes kids think that belonging to a clique will keep them from feeling left out. Some kids feel more powerful when they are mean to other people.

Some kids give in to peer pressure because they want to be liked, to fit in, or because they worry that other kids may make fun of them if they don't go along with the group. Others may go along because they are curious to try something new that others are doing. The idea that "everyone's doing it" may influence some kids to leave their better judgment, or their common sense, behind.

Kids in cliques sometimes act differently than they would outside the group. They often go along with what the others are doing, even if they know it's not right — even if it means leaving out a friend. They might feel bad about it, but they can't figure out how to be cool and still be nice to the person who's not in the clique. This is no excuse, though. Plenty of kids manage to be nice to everyone — kids in and outside their closest group of friends — without being part of a clique.
Sometimes kids in cliques find that they don't really want to belong to it anymore. They don't want to be bossed around by the rules of the clique, and they don't want to leave others out and hurt people's feelings.

Sometimes they realize they are missing out on being friends with great kids outside of the clique. Some kids realize that they have to give up some freedom and maybe even change the kind of people they are or what kind of music they like or clothes they want to wear.

Even if no one is being mean to you personally, you still might find it annoying if there are cliques you're not welcome to be part of. Or you might be part of a clique, but are getting tired of being bossed around.

As kids get older, they usually outgrow the need to be part of a clique or they are more relaxed about who is "in" and who is "out." For some kids this takes a while. Most cliques have disappeared by the end of high school, making way for more fun and enjoyable friendship groups.

Sincerely ,

Renee .